Not In Words Alone
As most people know, President Obama and his family are vacationing on nearby Mount Desert Island (MDI) this weekend. In advance of their arrival in Bar Harbor, along with all the security precautions and hordes of secret service personnel (“lots of men in ironed shirts” as one ice cream shop owner put it), the weekly Ellsworth American editorial welcomed the President and offered a few insights, mostly about the people of Downeast Maine.
Visitors, the editor wrote, “should not mistake standoffishness for a snub.” (Note: given the number of folks gathering pre-dawn for a late afternoon Presidential arrival, standoffishness will not likely mar the First Family’s visit. Nor will a snub. A few protest signs, maybe. A snub, not so much.)
The editor also noted that this is a “state where those of greater means always have had their pick of the best land, the best homes and the best jobs” (hmm, is there a state where this doesn’t hold true? Just saying.) and therefore, folks here have naturally developed “a tendency to withhold the one thing that money can’t buy – acceptance.” That is earned through “actions, example and deed, not words.”
Okay, little argument there. The old saw: “Actions speak louder than words.” But words are what gets thing rolling, no? Even when you’re the President in the ice cream shop inquiring of the owners about the family photos hung there or apologizing to fellow restaurant patrons for gumming up the traffic. It applies here, on this island, too – whether you’re visiting for a weekend, bedding down in a summer cottage rental for a week, returning as a summer resident or staking out territory as a new transplant. It starts with words.
And so, in the spirit of the Ellsworth American editorial, let me offer a few conversational tips, advice offered to me over the years or acquired through my own observation and personal experience (read: personal stumbles).
First, never, and I mean never, talk politics with anyone you don’t know well. Like, really well.
On the other hand, it’s always safe to talk about the weather. You’ll never be held accountable for it and everyone’s got something to say about it. Typically it’s either too cold. Or it’s too hot. There’s too much rain or not enough of it. Fog pretty much speaks for itself.
There’s safety, too, in grousing about the need to drive to Ellsworth, whether it’s of necessity or to haul a houseguest over to MDI. (Note: the Presidential visit notwithstanding, Bar Harbor is for most islanders here an example of what we want this place not to be – and another safe enough topic.)
On the subject of driving, it’s probably okay to curse the daytrippers’ typical behind the wheel slow-down-and-gawk technique, even if many of us once practiced it ourselves. And we can all complain about the slow-going one-way traffic at our cable bridge in what, though only of a few years’ duration, seems like an endless summer repainting and redecking construction project. How it’s been likened to a “traffic jam” by folks less familiar with, say, New York or Chicago requires no comment so best keep your mouth shut on that one.
It’s also best never to assume that someone else on the island with the same last name as the person you’re speaking with is related.
In the topic category of “Possible But Only If” is baseball. Baseball here means one thing: the Red Sox. Period. And heaven help you if you’re a Yankees fan.
If talking to a lobsterman, assume the following: the catch is puny, the boat price low, the bait price high, the regulations too many. Mention float lines or sinking lines but only at your peril. Consider yourself sufficiently warned.
Black flies and mosquitoes are universally despised. Feel free to curse either. And trust me, you will.
Remember, this is imperative: pass along any alleged island sightings of bear or moose.
And finally, feel safe in this acknowledgement: Everything is sooo much better in September.